Sometimes it’s just easier to get an objective opinion about the person you’re dating if you bring your friends along. Sound weird? It shouldn’t. Double dates are alive and well and provide security for a new couple who may feel nervous about starting the dating process. If you’ve been dating online, and the moment of truth has arrived when it’s time to meet in person, why not suggest a double date to ease the pressure?
Obviously, you need to get your date’s approval before bringing in the A-team to assess your new partner’s potential. The two of you can take the pressure off even more by suggesting a group activity. Maybe you and your new guy can meet your friends and his friends at a karaoke bar, a bowling alley, or a street fair. The group dynamic may be just what you both need to take the pressure off and alleviate any nervousness you may be feeling.
The advantages of having a friend with you on a first date can help give you the perspective you need. The two of you can sneak off to the bathroom together and exchange notes. And certainly, if the date is going poorly, it’s an easy out to end things early. Of course, if things are going well, the sneaking off you do may very well be with your date. If you feel a connection, you may want a little alone time to make sure things are clicking between you.
It may not always be ideal to go on a double date. But when uncertainty strikes, it’s a good alternative. First dates are usually awkward anyway, so do yourself a favor and make things as easy and as carefree as possible. If things work out between you and your online date, you can arrange a second date for just the two of you. If you didn’t click, then hopefully it wasn’t a total loss and you enjoyed a nice time out with your friends.
If you do decide to make your first date a double date, make sure that whatever you do, don’t ignore your date, even if you don’t find him interesting. Try to make eye contact and engage him in conversation. Sometimes in a group situation, all four of you will be talking about a similar subject, but often the pair will splinter off. If this happens, stay with your date. After all, this is event is about finding out whether or not the two of you have potential as a couple. If it’s torture, then find a way to end the evening early. Conversely, if you’re hitting it off with your new guy, don’t abandon your friends. They are there doing you a favor, so be sure that you keep your manners in check on all fronts. If you score a second date, good for you. And maybe for date number two, you’ll leave your friends at home.
Photo via jordaan mason
